While sitting at my kids school and heard two women gossiping about other people’s relationship. I laughed at the one women that kept saying, “If I was her I would leave him.” The problems that were presented in the conversation varied. One issue that sticks out was her best friend husband rarely does housework. Her companion’s response was: “If I was her I would leave him.”
Of course this had me trying to hide my laughter. By the end of the conversation I realized that both women were single and wanting to get married. This made this conversation even more hilarious because it is easy to say what you won’t tolerate when you aren’t in the exact situation.
This had me thinking about being younger and thinking I wanted to get married. Thinking there was a knight and shinning armor coming to rescue me. Funny, right? Damn Disney movies! So I get older then realize that was the silliest and unrealistic view of relationships. Then I start to see those around me get married. On the outside they seem like they are so super happy.. Like their life was somehow “complete” because they found each other. After all, they were destined to be together, right?
Well, with random conversations with different women I know I realized that we all have some varying degrees of “issues”. Two women I know have husbands that have had affairs. One husband even got another woman pregnant. Another women has been married close to a decade and the last two years the communication has completely shut down. They don’t even have the united front anymore! Anyone can see the strain this relationship is under and it’s actually painful to watch. The other marriage seems fun and light yet their vast differences (what initially was attractive) seem to be slowly driving them both crazy.
Do these couples still fight for their marriage or should they move on? When should you just split?
I too, have taken the plunge and like anything it takes dedication. It is easy to say I do, but harder to do the work everyday through different trials. I say there is not a one size fit all answer to working out marital issues. Every couple has to do what is best for them.